Reflection.

December has come and gone, and so has 2018. This last year was…well we learned how to survive after losing an income.

Losing an income is beyond stressful. I truly don’t know the exact word to describe it or if such a word even exists. The rug pulled out from underneath my feet and I felt like I couldn’t get my footing. There was nothing solid to stand on to get back upright. So much change, incredible amounts of stress, firsts, lasts, heartbreak, anxiety, anticipation, and excitement.

We took a crazy chance to start a blog in hopes that people would enjoy following our journey. We loaded up our family on an epic road trip to find our new home. Although I am 100% thankful for where we are now, not just geographically but in so many aspects of our family life, I don’t know if I could do 2018 over again.

Last December Levi left his job. Losing our only income, we were in crisis. We had very little savings to tide us over and a mortgage looming over our heads. Both quick to find “band-aid” jobs, we were stable enough to “live” paycheck to paycheck. We figured out priority on bills and cut costs in every way we could.

Our work schedules meticulously arranged so that we never had to pay for a babysitter. Levi worked days, while I worked nights. Most afternoons Levi would call when he was a few minutes from home and I ran outside and jumped into my car. Called him as I drove to work filling him in on the day. What was planned, if anything, for dinner, how the kids were doing, yada yada.

It was a shitty time to put it nicely. Our marriage was failing, I could feel resentment and distance growing day by day. We were struggling to stay above water paying our bills with what minimal money we had coming in. We were struggling to survive after losing an income.

Parenting consisted of a pretty solid schedule of Netflix and YouTube. Crap comfort food, most frequently Blue Bell Ice Cream (its so freaking good!), added some nice cushion to my frame. But it made me feel tired and gross.

Our state of crisis continued for months on end. My job wasn’t very busy, and I worked on commission. Levi was not getting any solid bites on a professional job that paid him what we considered a fair wage. So we knew it was time to take a drastic step or we weren’t going to last.

How did we get here?

Going back to set the stage a little bit. We moved to Texas less than three short years ago. A quick Texas weekend trip exploring the area for leads, Levi got a job offer. We moved to the town where I grew up, close to where most of my family lives. Wanting to move to Texas to be close to my siblings, for our kiddos to grow up knowing each other. A larger town with more opportunity to experience sports, concerts, culture, etc. Levi wanted to work for a company with room to grow. The potential to make more money by working hard, being financially rewarded for going above and beyond.

We did get to be close to my siblings and family. The cousins were best of friends. Levi’s job turned out to be a lemon. And the town we lived in wasn’t where we wanted to end up.

We still yearned for a lifestyle we hadn’t yet achieved in our Texas move so we came up with The Road Knott Taken. We made our must have list in a new home town, researched areas we felt might fit the bill and spent months getting the wheels in motion.

And by now you know the rest 🙂

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2019, I welcome you!!

“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language and next year’s words await another voice, and to make an end is to make a beginning.”